Deep down in the sub-basement of Newsweek, the man in a really expensive suit broods over how he’s going to get back at the lowly Republican White House who had foiled his master plan of killing every soldier in Iraq and Afghanistan all at once with his magazine. What next? A phone starts to ring, but not the phone on his desk. No, it was the one inside of the desk. “Thank You”, he whispers to himself as he opens the drawer and answers the receiver of the red phone.
“Hello.”
‘You caused quite a ruckus. Didn’t we tell you to bribe them?’
“We did.”
‘That Pentagon trash! I knew they were lying to me.’
“What now?”
‘The Liberal Media high council has consulted with Satan just now, you have nothing to worry about. Our master shall deploy the New York Times with forged reports of criminal charges involving interrogators in Afghanistan. We’re going to allege they killed an innocent taxi driver who had been caught doing nothing.’
“Elaborate, extremely wise.”
‘God’s soldiers will not foil this plan. The ratings of their savior are falling as we speak. God’s only begotten son, FoxNews, will need its disciple O’Reiley to book Michael Jackson to the show for them to prevail.’
“I am grateful.”
‘Go on now loyal demon and continue with your work.’
“Hail Satan!”
‘Hail Satan! Goodbye.’
“Yep, bye.”
Another day alive, rich and still in charge of something for the man in the expensive suit.
Hey, that’s pretty good. Where did you find that? On a side note, I think Newsweek is just incompetant and was only after a huge increase in circulation sales, they didn’t mean to kill anyone, but sales went up so it’s ok. More greed at any expense kinda thing.
I wrote it. This is Chris – logged in as admin
Circulation numbers, ratings…that’s all it’s about. For everyone but CSPAN and me. Heh…
It is good to know that all we need to do to win this war on terrorism is keep these countries from reading newsweek.
That’s the most ridiculous aspect of the scandal and it’s effect on the political landscape. In the scope of the entire war and the events that have gone into shaping our opinions, for this story to have such a large impact is sad.
We’re too often latching onto things and slaping them on our foreheads. The level of discussion breaks down when these auto-responses are latched onto. A discussion of on-the-go news that enters our heads without adequate fact checking is absolutely legitimate right now, but if the discussion gets funneled into ‘CBS/Newsweek’ every single time, we’re not getting to the bottom of it. Cable news is the villian here. But 100 discrepancies can go out over cable news without anyone but mediamatters.org taking note.
The blogsphere sucks when it comes to this. The latching on and milking of one thing that is indicative of a greater problem…though most of these schmucks never connect the dots, but instead facilitate a flame war that’s also taking place on 1000+ other sites in the same way with the same arguments. I hope to never get to that point. I think it’s sad.
Jeff Gannon-Newsweek are two examples of where the blogs merely post the same exact thing. Why the hell should anyone come to deadissue if they can get the exact same discussion in 1000+ other places at the same time.
Am I wrong in passing up this crap? Are people going to hit up deadissue looking for the opinions of Right Thinker, karl and co. on the ‘catch of the day’?
Perhaps this is when I try my hand at comedy writing – and every time a story is latched onto and sensationalized, I can write some satire and the subsequent comments can take on the discussion of it. Maybe this is the thing to do…because if I were to sit down and write an article that’s already been written a thousand times – it would feel like shit. Just doesn’t do it for me.
OK – now I feel like Rush Limbaugh…been babbling here…
Hope everyone had a great weekend! Last episode of Deadwood TO-NITE!!!!
You feel like Rush Limbaugh? Get into rehab quick.
The landscape is changing, for awhile all we heard is that we are winning the war the media just wont talk about it, now we have moved on to the we are losing but it is the medias fault stage; In a couple more years we will be onto the peace with honor stage and then leaving from the rooftops by helicoptor.
You make a good point about not blogging about the same thing as everyone else, one of the things that makes right thinking sort of fun is the eclectic mix of stuff that guy finds. One thing that seems like it would make a good topic is the metrosexulity of most conservatives, go to any campus republican function and you will see what I mean.
Right keeps us on our toes alright! The story on the dad who got sued by the football coach had me thinking about little league for a good two hours. I’ve been messing around with an article on that topic…
As for the metro-republicans, I kind of see what you’re saying. Santorum is the metro-republican-icon…cover of the New York Times Magazine…I’m putting off reading that for a few days. He’s been enjoying the WallMart private jet lately – I can’t make heads or tails of the guy just yet.
Half expecting a gay lover to pop up out of the woodwork any day now.
I see the groundwork being laid right now. The ‘media lost us Vietnam’ theory holds no water. I haven’t read a convincing argument yet. It’s pride that leads to such conclusions. There’s a book in nailing this down.
Youth sports are the root of all evil, I walk my dog at this park that has little league baseball, the parents are always yelling and the kids are crying, and it is amazing how many parents think their kids are going to be pros.
As for metro repubs bill owens is the poster child, although the rumors about him were that he had a child with someone other than his wife, which I guess would disqualify him.
It can be a really positive thing. The parents ruin it…that and the politics within the league the kids are playing in.
I heard someone say this weekend that there’s a saying in Washington that a politician’s worst nightmare is to be caught with either a ‘live boy or a dead girl’…kind of sick, but very true.